I've been catching up on my Baha'i reading lately.
First I read A Love Which Does Not Wait by Janet Ruhe-Schoen, which is about some of the early pioneers. In the book she tells the stories of their lives, and explains that despite the challenges that they faced, because of their love for the Faith and Baha'u'llah, they persevered. Some of them rode on trains with the cows, one couple spent a large portion of their marriage only seeing each other a few times a year, and one of them was asked to wear the same outfit every day.... Now I am reading Lua Getsinger Herald of the Covenant by Velda Piff Metelmann, and there is a section in chapter 7 (page 72) that quotes a tablet given to Lua from 'Abdu'l-Baha during a time when she was experiencing difficulty. It reads:
"The more difficulties one sees in this world the more perfect one becomes. The more you plough and dig in the ground the more fertile it becomes. The more you cut the branches of a tree, the higher and stronger it grows. The more you put gold in the fire, the purer it becomes. The more you sharpen the steel by grinding, the better it cuts. Therefore, the more sorrows one sees, the more perfect one becomes, That is why in all times the prophets of GOD have had tribulations and difficulties to withstand. The more often a captain of a ship is in the tempest and difficult sailing, the greater his knowledge becomes. Therefore, I am happy that you have had great tribulations and difficulties; -of this I am very happy- that you have had many sorrows. Strange it is that I love you and still I am happy that you have sorrows!"
After reading this and thinking about the recent challenges I've faced, I believe that 'Abdu'l-Baha is very happy now. I've often wondered why we face the particular tests that we do, and I wonder why the tests I am given seem so monumental at the time, yet in retrospect or compared to other people's trials, they are minuscule.
I had a very nice, very long conversation with my friend the other day, and she, too, is being tested. She's being tested in ways that I could not even imagine...my heart was breaking knowing that I couldn't give her a hug, or go with her to do the things she needed to do.
My fiance has been in another state for a little over a month now, and will be in another state for at least another 17 months and it's proven to be very difficult for both of us. Not that I make things any better by whining and crying about it all the time....but I know it could be worse! He could be in another country without any communication with the outside world. He could still be in the military and be deployed to somewhere "off the grid." I could not have a fiance at all....He could live in another state permanently and not have a solid idea of when we could be together....I could be one of those women who gets beaten everyday and is afraid to leave...I could be on drugs and unable to get clean....my pre-cancerous cells could mutate into full blown cancer....so many other things could be happening to me right now!
My mom works with a lady who has severe osteoporosis. Because of this she has a hunchback.This woman has two children, ages 8 and 10. She lives in low income housing. One day, shortly after moving in to her apartment, she heard a knock on the door. She opened it, and a man with a large knife pushed through, slicing her neck. He then went in and raped her 8 year old daughter and gutted her 10 year old son....all three of them survived, and I am pretty sure they caught the man....but I don't know what I would have done if that had been me....I don't know if it's wrong to look forward to the day that man meets our just God...or should I just fall to my knees and cry, "Ya Allah'u'Abha!!" and thank Him for protecting me from the evil in this world, and ask Him to bless that woman and her children, and heal them, physically and emotionally.....
What I'm trying to say here I guess, is what I need to remind myself always.....God tests us so that we may grow, and learn...and despite how bad it gets. How hard it is. How much it burns like the fire. It could always be worse. It could always get worse if we aren't careful and thankful for our blessings.
I am thankful, God. I am thankful that there are people in this world that love me. I am thankful that in this economy I am blessed with not one, but two jobs. I am thankful that I am able to go to the grocery store once a month and buy groceries. I am thankful that I have chosen my friends and peers wisely and that I have not fallen into the drug trap that so many of my former friends have. I am thankful God, that I was given the opportunity to travel to the Holy Land and to walk where Your Manifestations walked. I am thankful that I have a bed to sleep in and a roof to keep me dry. I am thankful for my overall good health. Lastly God, I am thankful for my Faith. My Faith that You will keep me safe and happy, despite my fears and uncertainties.
Ruhiyyih Khanum said the following about Faith:
To breathe where there is no air
To see where there is no light
This is Faith
To cry out in the silence,
The silence of the night,
And hearing no echo, believe
And believe again and again
This is Faith
To hold pebbles and see jewels
To raise sticks and see forests
To smile with weeping eyes
This is Faith
To say: 'God I believe' when others deny,
'I hear' where there is no answer
'I see' though naught is seen
This is Faith
And the fierce love in the heart,
The savage love that cries
Hidden Thou art, yet there!
Veil Thy face and mute Thy tongue
Yet I see and hear Thee, Love,
Beat me down to the bare earth
Yet I rise and love Thee, Love!
This is Faith.
So now, the challenge.
Remember! It could be worse! HAVE FAITH THAT IT WILL GET BETTER!!!
