F.T.A.A. or Failure to Appear at Altar

Lately I've been doing an extreme amount of reflecting. My entire life I have done things. Usually those said things have involved LOTS of people. Whether singing in the Church choir with my mom, or playing softball every year from the ages of 5-12. I was in drama, band, choir, SADD, book club, track and field, and volleyball.....my point is, I suck at being alone and doing things for myself and by myself. I'm terrible at it!

Being terrible at being alone also makes it difficult for me to be in healthy relationships. I have noticed this, and it has also been pointed out to me numerous times by plenty of people. Something that adds to this is the pressure I currently feel to get married. Now I am very happy to see most of my friends married, engaged, and/or starting families; and don't get me wrong, I am also VERY happy that 3 of my cousins are engaged...but it's weird for me. I have never been the single one.

EVER.

So how do I get around this pressure? How do I avoid feeling like a social failure? My family's background is Mormon, my friends are all nesting, and even the mailman is getting in on the bridal craze!










So there you have it ladies and gentlemen! Women in the 21st century are "supposed" to be married and having children by the age of 25, along with holding down a great career after having gone to school and gotten their degree in record time! They also should be a size 2 with a perfect smile and a great bikini body!

(Miss America 2009)



At this rate, I should have run for Miss America in 1951

Sad thing is, the expectations were the same back then....

Why I Decided to Jump on the Blog Bandwagon

I have the need to write down my feelings and frustrations. Or talk them out. Just do something with them. I am not an internalizer. My problems and ideas need to be worked out vocally. I have often used the analogy that my ideas are like a ball of words, jumbled up in my brain. When I talk things out, or write them down, it's like throwing the ball at the wall; as the ball hits, the words become sentences and all of a sudden I can see the problem written down and I can figure out the answer.


So hello everyone, and welcome to the deep thoughts and amusing musings of my brain, plastered all over this wall for you to read along with me. I write when I have what I call writer's flow, which is the exact opposite of writer's block (hence the website name). So here we go!!